3 Things I’d Say to My 17-Year-Old Self If Had the Chance

Hey there! I have a great guest post for you all today! It’s my great friend Brandi from Dysfunctional Supermom!

We met a while back on Twitter, hit it off and have been friends ever since! She’s a great, really (she even sent me an awesome necklace for helping her out)! Check out her blog you’re sure to be entertained with what she has to say about life, kids, and everything in between!

Like me she’s a mom with 4 awesome kids and it took a marriage or two to find the perfect man, in her case it’s The Saint. Between the two of us we’re learning things along the way and doing the very best that we can for our kids.

Hope that you enjoy the break from the regularly scheduled programming! Oh! I almost forgot! I’m over at her place today…. go check it out! Quickly!

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Why, hello there, magic lovers. I’m very excited to be here and can’t say enough about your wonderful
bloggess, Jackie. She’s been more than a doll to me in the short time we’ve been friends and the fact
that she’s willing to let me post here just proves that she’s got HUGE *ahem* heart. *Snort*

I’ve got to tell you, that when I tossed out the feelers to see which of my Twitter friends wanted to do
a blog swap with me, I was very happy that Jackie was the one to jump on in. I like Jackie. She’s pretty
freakin’…well…magical.

And I stayed happy, because we easily agreed on the topic: ‘things we’d tell our younger selves’. Easy
breezy, mac & cheesy. (Ummm…by the way, I feel as though I should tell you that since I’m doing my
very best not to be full of the foul over here out of respect for Jackie’s space; I’ve decided that to make
up for it, I’m going to be the most obnoxiously corny character I possibly can. You’re welcome.)

Where were we?

Oh yeah. Sorry.

Ok, so I started thinking about my younger self. My 17 year old, engaged to my first husband, fresh out
of high school self; and y’all…she started to piss me off. (Wait. Can I say that here?)

Crap. Anyway.

So here goes.

Dear Brandi,

There are few things I’d like you to know before you take one more step. So, please, PLEASE, for the love
of all things holy…STOP! That’s it. Right there.

Nope. Don’t even bother opening that cute little pie-hole of yours; because nothing insightful will come
out anyway. No, you are not as wise as you think you are; so just please sit down and shut up for a few
minutes. This won’t take long, but it just might save you a couple decades of pain and suffering.

Ready? Here we go.

1. 18 is too young to get married. Period. You are not ready. Everyone around you that says
otherwise is a moron. Do not listen to them. It doesn’t matter that he is a preacher and comes
from a good family, because he is also too young and you will both regret it. Trust me. However,
I know that you are going to do this anyway, which leads me to number 2.
2. When you are 23 and your life is falling apart around you: your marriage, your career,
your friendships…and everything you believed to be stable and ‘real’ all of the sudden
crumbles…please do not blame yourself. You are only human: just a little girl still in many, many
ways. God is great, but therapy is necessary. Start early. Trust me on this one.
3. Finally, at least for now, because there is so much more that I want to tell you, but I’m going to

need a big ass journal. (Wait…can I say that here? CRAP!) *Sigh*
You are NOT the sum of all of your failures, or your successes. You are a paradox. You are
cracked, but not broken. You are a little ‘off’ but not crazy. You will be a different kind of
mother, but you will be damn good at it. You will have no idea what you want to be when you
grow up for a very, very long time…but you will also be okay with that fact.

Cut yourself some slack, girl. You’re worth the effort.

Love,

You

The Magic of the Holidays

A Danish Christmas tree illuminated with burni...
Image via Wikipedia

Do you remember the holidays when you were a child? How everything started at Thanksgiving with the family gathering and hope for snow to soon start falling. I remember running around with my cousins and sitting at the kids table. It was a magical & fun time.

As children my brother, sister, and I would all make lists of all the wonderful and newest toys that we wanted, we promised to be good and often tried really hard too! Once the decorations started going up the magic only increased. The smell of the fresh cut pine tree was always the first thing because every year no matter what we had a real tree and never a fake one. We’d all go out to a local tree farm and walk around until we found the perfect tree and then my dad would cut it down, the following day we’d bring it in the house and begin to decorate it.

The twinkling lights, the shiny bulbs, and decorations that were made with care in art class at school all went up on the tree. It was never one of those perfect show trees and to this day I’ve never had that kind of tree! Shortly following the tree the stockings and all the other decorations would go up around the house. It was all so beautiful and even more so as a kid!

We’d watch all the great Christmas shows & cartoons that we patiently waited for each year! To this day I watch every single one of them with my kids! And I don’t know a person who doesn’t like them!

As Christmas eve approached the excitement grew! We’d leave out cookies & milk for Santa, which he always ate, and carrots for the reindeer. Now, my kids leave cookies out as well, but sometimes instead of carrots they’ve left reindeer food that they’ve made in school. I hear the reindeer really like the oatmeal & glitter mix a lot more than carrots!

Even now, as an adult there’s magic in Christmas. I love watching the building excitement in my kids as it gets closer to the big day! Every Christmas Eve we leave the tree lit all night as we wait for Santa and then once the kids are all tucked away in their warm beds upstairs we start pulling out the presents and stacking them around the tree. Slowly our living room transforms into a Christmas wonderland! Afterwords I even find it hard to sleep the night through! It’s so exciting waiting for the kids to wake and come down in the morning!

My favorite part is when they come down and see all the gifts & the stockings filled to the top. I can hear them looking around excitedly, poking at all the gifts as they figure out which one belongs to who. It’s so much fun to listen and then pretend to sleep when one of them comes to wake us.

It really is magical! What is your favorite part of the holiday season? Is it still magical for you?

Time to get Festive!!

First of all I’m sorry for being lazy… I haven’t posted anything in a while. Somehow between work and everything else I just let the blog slide. Then again family is more important than the blog!

I bet by now many of you have the holiday decorating done, your homes are filled with beautiful & festive decorations, and you’re just about ready for the holidays! Right? Well, I’m not. I just got out some of the decorations. There’s no tree and we can’t even decide if we are getting a real one or just throwing up the fake one this year!

You’re probably wondering what’s up with her! Well, here’s the deal. I have a beautiful daughter who just had a birthday and I hate to combine it with the holidays.

I’ve spent the last 15 years making sure that she had her special day. That meant that there were no holiday decorations up at her birthday party, her gifts are always wrapped in birthday paper, she is never shorted on gifts, and she has the same opportunities for a great birthday as all the other kids. It’s not her fault that her birthday is close to Christmas.

Now my baby is 15 years old. I’ve watched her grow and change into an incredibly smart, beautiful, and fun person that I’m very proud of. Sometimes I wonder where all the time has gone and if I missed something really important even though I’ve always been there.

Cait & Santa

She looks so happy visiting with Santa. Now she doesn’t believe in him (even though many of her gifts are from Santa) and I don’t think that I could get her to sit with Santa for a picture unless her life depended on it!

Cait

Isn’t she cute!! Why is it that when they’re younger they’re happy and willing to look at the camera and smile?

And now she’s grown up. Every day is a reminder of the the adult that she’s turning into and the little girl that she isn’t anymore.

Cait Now

Now if I were a good mom I’d have some of the cutest baby pictures ever of her here as well, but since that was way before digital cameras I have to pull out the scanner, plug it in, and scan them all! I’ll save that for another day!

Now that all the birthday fun has passed the festive holiday season can start! I love decorating and this year Cait is helping me get things done!

I’m Falling….

I wasn’t going to do the Writer’s Workshop today because I have a lot going on at work but then decided I to do it anyway. It’s the only thing that I’ve been able to do with some regularity.

Mama's Losin' It


The options this week were sort of difficult. I wasn’t sure what one to pick or how to go about writing about one of them. I thought about them a while and finally settled on a childhood fear that I’ve taken into my adult life.


So, how is fear defined? Dictionary.com describes it as a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid.

A fear can be anything and sometimes so real that it can be debilitating to a person. To children, something they fear can be so strong they actually think it’s real.

When I was a child, probably 8 years old or younger I had a dream that to this day (almost 30 yrs later) I remember vividly. It was so real to me and to this day I hold that fear.

It was a dark, gloomy day like just before a bad storm hits. There were dark clouds in the sky, but the wind was calm as I walked down the driveway towards the mail box. I don’t know why I was going out to get the mail since it was something that I didn’t normally do.

The next scene of my dream was me standing at the mailbox and the little boy who lived across the street was there with me and a little girl, a friend I assume. We talked for a bit and I was afraid, but I can’t remember why or of what.

I finally opened the mailbox and as I opened it I fell into the earth. It was a huge hole and I just fell, and fell, and fell. Fast. Like a free fall.

To this day I do not like free falling rides and even sometimes roller coasters that go down at a steep angle bother me. They scare the living hell out of me. I hate the feeling of falling as we go down a hill on the roller coaster as your body is lifted off the seat. I hold on as tight as I can and keep my eyes closed even tighter. There are those who love the rush and will do it again and again. Not me.

It’s possible that it’s totally an irrational fear or maybe not. But for me it’s none the less a fear. One based on a childhood dream and one that I can’t seem to let go.

They’re alive! Really, they are!!

KnuffelsImage via WikipediaIt’s that time of week again! Mama Kat’s Writers Workshop!! I really think that this is my favorite day of the week!

This week the choice was easy. I decided to write about the things you oddly obsessed about as a child.

When I was a child I had lots of dolls, stuffed animals, Barbies, and what not. But then again what child didn’t! They were all in my room where I played with them day in and day out, sometimes alone and sometimes with my friends or my little sister. 

At night things changed though. Everything was different. I truly believed that all of my toys came to life. And I’m pretty sure that Pixar mined my brain for the idea for the Toy Story movies! But that aside, the toys in my room were real, alive, and had a life their own. I would talk to them as if they were real people and cared for them in the same way. I was careful with them… okay, that part may be a bit of the truth being stretched. I was a kid after all!

Because the toys were alive I knew that I had to treat them nicely! They would get upset or I’d hurt their feelings. And then if that happened I’d be upset too.

The imagination of a child is incredibly amazing. We think of anything and everything, we believe almost anything. As a child we want to believe everything. As children we don’t discount anything as impossible and why should it be? Given time anything is possible!

To this day I let my children believe what they want, because who am I to crush their dreams & hopes and tell them what they believe isn’t real? They’re only children once and I saw let them enjoy it while they can.

Just remember your toys can come alive at night too!

Mama's Losin' It

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